Mission Accomplished

So now the trip…My Mom always said it’s fun to have something to look forward to. I feel like I have lived my life looking forward to things. The upcoming concert, the big party, the wedding, the birth of a child and on and on. The trip I was looking forward to for a couple of years is now over in a blink. And looking back, Mom is right – the anticipation was fun!

Five women leaving their spouses and kids behind for adventure, Florida sun and sand, daily transportation by trolley, side-splitting laughter and snorts, inside jokes, vodka tonics (too many!) and very little sleep – how lucky am I?

It was so fun to learn more about these women in my life as the trip unfolded. We had everything covered from the navigator who rode shotgun to the cook who prepared the best homemade scrambled eggs in recent memory. From the “cruise director” who planned our big excursion to the best parallel parker who shouted turn by turn instructions from the back seat (thank you). And for each one liner that had us all in hysterics I’m sure there is a stand-up comedian somewhere who is jealous.

I loved hanging out in the company of four great friends anticipating the half marathon we would all run together, the relief we would feel when it was over and the ensuing celebration. Having put a lot of pressure on myself to make this race count and try for a “PR” or personal record I was very focused on making that happen. However, I was never so relaxed before a race as on this trip. It could have been the location, the company I was with, the vodka tonics or the delirious lack of sleep. But it was a new and welcome feeling!

However the highlight of the race was not conquering the course or meeting the goal. It was witnessing a friend face the unknown, overcome many hurdles in her training, doubt herself regularly and still show up no matter what. It was watching her smile and wave at the eighth mile and seeing that same smile at the thirteenth mile. Many times throughout the course I thought of her and hoped that she wasn’t wishing I had not dragged her into this experience! And when she crossed that finish line it was such a huge victory and we savored it with her.

I do not know when I will have another opportunity to experience something like this trip again. But that is not for me to worry about. I have these sunburned body parts, these wonderful memories, these amazing friends. Mission accomplished.

There’s No Place Like Mom

My milestone birthday girls’ trip I’ve been planning for 6 months complete with grueling half marathon in the steamy Florida heat is here. I can’t remember now – I wanted to celebrate this way why? Five days without laundry piles, mounds of dishes, poopy diapers, chauffering, pouring rain and chill and early morning wake-up calls. Ah yes, it’s coming back to me…

However, the prospect of coordinating childcare, grocery shopping and making sure Ice knows what to take to the babysitters’ house is slightly daunting. Communicating Little Bee’s food preferences and semi-nap schedule (I say semi- because if I told you childcare providers that she doesn’t nap regularly would you still have taken her?) Trying to make time to pack and needlessly putting pressure on myself to find time to “air dry” after I slap orange lotion on my body to make it look like I am tan when clearly I am white as rice and from Wisconsin is ridiculous (I can see that now! Heck, I could see it then but I still wanted to do it anyway)!

But the coup de gras is the anxiety I am harboring that my house could not function without me for 5 days now that we have a baby again. A couple of years ago sure I would miss Techno and Twinkle – a lot. But they can actually wake up and pour their own bowl of cereal and handle the ins and outs of a bathroom quite well. What happens if the drippy nose Little Bee started to get before I left turns into something more serious? What if she finally starts crawling and I miss it? What if she won’t take her bottle? Afterall she’s still a breastfed baby.

And don’t even get me started on how much pressure I put on myself to ensure that when I got on that plane bound for home that I had the “liquid gold” that all nursing Moms protect and defend to the death. It really was remarkable the federal case I made out of this issue. There were friends, family, flight attendants, TSA agents and as Ice likes to joke “the interweb” weighing in on my conundrum of how to transport Bee’s hot commodity on the airplane and intact when I arrived home. I discussed it on the phone, at the babysitter’s, on the treadmill training for the race, in my kitchen over a glass of wine with friends and I’m sure numerous other places I have now forgotten.

In the end, it wasn’t the dry ice that I secured ( a “hazardous material”) that caused the TSA agents at the airport to frown. It was the bottled water I hadn’t emptied before I went through! Geesh!

So now is my public THANK YOU to all who endured the repeated and I’m certain dreaded conversations of me brainstorming out loud about it – you know who you are!

And for all the worry? As Ice reminded me before I left, “Honey, I run a company, I got this!” And as always, so he did.

The washer and dryer were empty as was the laundry basket on top. The dishes were done. And my personal catch-all spot in the kitchen was spotless. Even my baby who I feared might be getting cranky beyond consoling from missing her Mama took a moment to warm-up to me when she first saw me. She gave me a look like….”Mmmmm, you look familiar but I can’t quite place you!” Afterall, how far back does a 10 month-old baby’s memory really go? I can now say it is dangerously close to 5 days!

So once again I learn that all the worry and undue stress is all for naught. My family gets along fine without me. I think it is my ego that suffers the most!

To Be Continued…

Gimme a (Spring) Break!

It is Spring Break for my 10-year old son and 8-year old daughter, heretofore referred to as Techno (for his affinity for his laptop, my cell phone and the occasional X-Box session) and Twinkle Toes (it’s obvious, right?) We are not in the -land, -world, -shores. -beach or anything remotely vacation sounding this week. We are at HOME. Gasp! Does anybody do that anymore??

Each morning I still get up at 6:30am because my smallest creation, 9 month-old Little Bee doesn’t know it is Spring Break and she has no notion of sleeping in. As this week’s cruise director I am reminded each morning that Techno and Twinkle’s friends are not home. My favorite phrase du jour…What are we going to do today?

It is an act of Congress to get Little Bee fed, take a shower and do some light housework (by light I mean make sure that the dishes do not reach the ceiling, ditto the laundry). I have found that by the time I accomplish these tasks it is almost time for the next meal and the ensuing “light housework”.

Meanwhile when my mind can take a millisecond to wander I envision the scores of families enjoying a toe in the sand, a ride on the teacups or a splash from Shamu. Back to the dishes…

Easter weekend kicked off with the climax of my own terrible sinus and congestion issues. Twinkle experienced some major gastrointestinal upset. And in between her heaves, Techno and I decorated Easter eggs. Peter Cottontail still had to make a stop at our house and as is customary hide the eggs that we color.

My dear husband, Ice (the love of my life and my In Case of Emergency) coughed and sputtered his way through the weekend only to find out Monday morning that he had his first case (and hopefully the last!) of pneumonia.

And before I know it it is Sunday and Spring Break is fast coming to a close. What have we done?

Well I can report that I had some great couch time relaxing with Ice. I enjoyed a more complex than advertised sewing craft with Twinkle and a nice walk in the chilly air with Techno and Little Bee (WHEN will Spring come to the Midwest??) I managed to ignore most of the housework that desperately needed doing, showed Little Bee the finer points of riding my knees like an airplane and was taught a new card game by Twinkle. We enjoyed the Final Four games with good friends (go Wolverines!) and busted a few moves with Just Dance Greatest Hits.

I am thoroughly sick of watching the dust bunnies float by and if I am subjected to one more laugh track on a Disney show I will most certainly feel the need to scream. But damn I sure do enjoy the company I keep. Can we do this again next week? I’m just not ready to deal with the bunnies – dust not Peter Cottontail.

Leap of Faith

I am sitting on the precipice of a huge waterslide. The view down is obscured by the fact that the drop on the slide is so steep that you can’t even see where the slide ends. The water is rushing by. The people behind me are waiting to take their turn. The water slide operator (who has this job??) is smiling at my fear. And my husband is egging me on. We are in the Bahamas at the Atlantis resort on a MUCH anticpated vacation for the two of us.

I can’t do it. I thought I was brave enough. I was all puffed up and ready to go. No problem…Seriously?!

Okay breathe. You got this. Afterall, this slide is called the Leap of Faith. And it was the ONE thing you swore you would check off on this trip. So what is happening? You are finally here. THIS is the moment. You are frozen in fear.

Like the woman training for her first marathon with doubts about the experience. Will she finish last? Will she injure herself in some way? Or the friend on the precipice of a divorce from an abusive relationship. Can she take that first scary step? How will her children cope? Is she doing the right thing?

These forks in the road occur all the time in daily life. For each woman who faces them there is the inevitable moment of feeling all alone. When the urge to turn back, stop in your tracks or take your ball and go home is just too strong.

What makes that moment pass? I asked myself that question recently when talking a friend through a scary, anxiety-filled event coming up. And for some reason I flashed back to this moment on the slide and how it felt. How I felt was so similar to what my friend was experiencing- anxious, scared and pondering “what will happen on the other side?”

Well what happened was I could not wait to go up to the top and ride down again!

Aren’t so many moments in life like this? You take a deep breath, calm yourself and take a Leap of Faith. I hope she can’t wait to do it again.